Bon Giourno?

Well I am suffering from a serious case of procrastination and apathy. I just can't seem to get anything done at the moment. I think it's because I'm such a goal oriented person. I always like to plan what is going to happen and where I'm heading.

I've been slowly coming to terms with how unlikely it is of doing medicine over here. The fees are just so high. It puts so much pressure on you to do well in the course and even afterwards. I read about one woman who graduated and works as a doctor but feels suicidal because of the pressure of debt from her student loans. I don't want that kind of debt haning over my head.

Also another reason is I don't want to have to get my mother as a guarantor on the loan. It's too much to ask of her. Especially as she has helped so much in my education up to now.

Soooo Irelands out, UK would be great I know that there are more grants etc available for students, but the fees are still high. Around £9,000.

Now I'm thinking of trying Italy where fees range from around 650-6500. That's the scary option of moving completely abroad.

I'm a shy person and I struggle with depression and fibromyalgia so the prospect of moving away from all my support systems to a country I've never been to and don't speak the native language is a pretty intimidating one!

I also have to take an entrance exam which requires knowledge of science subjects. Not great for me.

This all probably means I'll need to take another year out after this degree I'm doing to get ready for it all. I know I can't be impatient about something so important but I feel like I've been waiting forever to do this. It's just horrible.

I probably need to stop worrying and planning so much for the future and just enjoy the present a bit more but I actually don't know how to do that. I am always thinking ahead. Always!

Well better head off and try get something done either work or meditation or something! :P

:)

Costly Courses and GAMSAT Prep!

I've been away from this blog for a while now. I'm struggling to find a way to get enough money together to pay for my college so it's not exactly encouraging me to come here and blog about the future when it's hard to see how I'm going to get there.

I am trying to remain hopeful and positive though. I WILL find a way through this undergrad and then onto the next stage. This next stage poses even bigger financial challenges though!

So lately when I get a spare few minutes, I have been looking into cheaper ways to study medicine as a post-grad. My first choice has always been to stay in Dublin and study at my old uni, UCD. However, the fees there are around 14,000 euro a year. Students are granted a loan to complete the course and then have to pay it back. But of course it takes a huge amount of careful consideration to sign on to a loan of that magnitude!

Honestly it scares the heck out of me! That's more money than I currently make in a year! :/

My next choice would be to look at studying in England. I've been there several times especially to London which is where I would love to study so it's not too intimidating a prospect. Also from looking at the cost of post-grad medicine over there it works out to be about 4,000 euro cheaper a year!

A couple of weeks ago I came across an article in a newspaper about studying across Europe. I started investigating how much it would cost to do medicine through English in different countries. The answer? A lot less!!!

Post-grad medicine in general seems roughly around the same figure as Ireland or the UK with the cheapest I have found in Poland for 10,000 euro a year. For the traditional full lenght course, fees start from around 1,000 euro a year upwards.

These courses are all taught through English and welcome European students to apply. However my guess is that you really would want to pick up the native language pretty quicky if you are treating patents etc.

But it's definately something to think about. I'm hearing about more and more people who are going abroad and getting their medical degrees before coming back here to work so ithis is a very real option for anyone wanting to pursue a career in medicine.

If anyone is interested in having a look at what programmes are offered around Europe (and at what cost) check out: http://www.eunicas.ie/

I love to let my mind wander and think of the future, about studying medince and becoming a doctor. But let's face it dreams don't just materialise overnight. It takes a lot of effort and hard work. So while it's important to have a clear vision of where you want to be in the future, I know I have to keep focused and chipping away at the work I'm doing now.

My GAMSAT preperation is seriously lacking. I've been letting the prospect overwhelm me and discourage me when I need to just give it a go. I started reading a bit on organic chemistry which I think I will really enjoy actually. Because it just feels more relevant than reading about electron orbitals etc. But the basics are essential so gotta get those down before jumping into the fun stuff!

For anyone needing to improve your sciences I really recommend paying a visit to the Khan Academy website. They offer FREE lessons on Physics, Chemistry, Biology and Maths as well as other non-GAMSAT related courses such as Art History (although let's face if with the GAMSAT anything could be relevant!)

Here's the link should you be interested:http://www.khanacademy.org/

Anyway that's about it for now. Have to go work on a journal article I'm writing. Has to be ready for publication by the end of the month. My oh my!

:)

Sun and Secrets

Morning!

Good lord it is hot here at the moment! 30 degrees. I'm definately not made for that kind of temperature. I was working in a hot kitchen for 5 days straight and now I've got a few days off I'm trying to recover from it! I do like the brightness of the sun though and I make sure to sit out and get my vitamin D for the day! :)

When I was working for those five days I actually got up early and studied chemistry before work. Now that I'm off I have to work extra hard not to be lazy. I need to study more.

I have been thinking about the year off after I finish my undergrad, and I reallyyy don't want to.

I am tempted to take my GAMSAT in March. I had previously discounted that as an option because it's in the middle of my final academic year. But I really want to just get started on my career.

So I'm considering that as an option at this stage.

I'm not going to tell anyone (except you) because I know no one will be supportive of the idea. I hate that I don't have that support in my life at the moment but well what can ya do?!

I'm off to make an iced americano before I melt!

:)

Summer time, restorative time!

Evening!


I love the summer! Free from college with no exams looming. Don't get me wrong I enjoy learning in college but it's nice to have a few months at a different pace. No timetable so I have control over what I want to do. Problem is I tend not to do too much. Lazy summer days and all that...

I try and save as much money as I possibly can by working in a restaurant. But this year there isn't that much work going this summer. Definately feeling a bit under pressure this year as I'm due to be charged full fees for my final year ( over 10,000 euro). Not sure how I am going to be able to afford it. I guess I will have to beg for a loan or something. Eeeeeek!

My summer studentship has kicked off properly now (although my contract still hasn't arrived!) I am starting to carry out a literature review at the moment. I'm a bit lost on the direction my work is supposed to take and unfortunately my supervisor is away for two weeks so I can't really ask. But I'll keep going on with what I'm doing.

I may have to reach out to and visit hospitals around the city to collect ideas and data. I don't know why but the thought of doing that makes me so nervous, though I love being in the hospital environment. It's just fascinating to me! My eyes can't dart around fast enough to take it all in!

Went to see my lecturer for feedback and she encouraged me to keep working away. She think I'm on track to get a 2:1 in my degree, which is great...but I would like a little higher! Also she encouraged me to follow on and pursue a career in medicine. That was really great for me because I always feel insecure when I tell people what I want to do. I'm always afraid they are judging me and laughing at me deep down. But having written that sentance I realise how pathetic that is. I don't really care what they think, at least I shouldn't. All that matters is what I think!

But mannn the process of getting feedback from lecturers is sooo intimidating. You basically sit there and let them tell you exactly how you messed up and failed on all your work. I had one lecturer actually laugh and say "This isn't primary or secondary school you know..." Oh dear.

I'm willing to take all the criticism though, I want to learn from my mistakes. I think you learn more from mistakes than you do from successes. Failure has a way of hitting you hard enough to stir you out of your comfort zone (hence me willingly meeting for criticism).

I'm scared because my final year is 100% of the mark for my degree, and one thing I struggle with (among many other things ha) is remaining consistent throughout the academic year. I suck at this actually. My grades swing from 40 or so up to 70/80! Big difference!

Having severe anaemia could explain a lot really. It makes me so sleepy and tired and it can also make you depressed so I hear. Have to get my iron levels up. I've been anaemic for at least five years that I know of.

Started a new diet to lose a little weight before the next term starts. I figure get into healthy eating habits now and hopefully be more inclined to keep them throughout the term.

2nd Year Results!!

Morning!

So I got my results on Thursday morning. Man I was praying and praying for a miracle, I truly knew that I was going to fail at least two subjects. I can't tell you how my heart was pounding away and how I felt like I was going to throw up as I entered my log in details on the website! I scanned the results on the screen and was amazed to find that I had not only passed everything but I had passed them by 20% or more!

I started jumping up and down and dancing around with my family heheh! :D

Honestly I still can't believe it. I spent so much time and energy dreading my results and it was all for nothing!

Really gave me motivation to attack my final year with gusto! I need to push HARD this year. I want to. I want to get either a 2:0 or a 1:2.

This week I also started a paid summer studentship in my college. It's so exciting to be employed by the university, even if it is only for a short time!

The best and most amazing part of the studentship is that I will be writing a research article, which my supervisor says will be picked up and published in an academic journal!

Not sure how she can assure me of that when the article is not even written yet but I am determined to work hard at it and get something published.

I am also trying to write a book at the moment. It's my personal story of struggling with eating disorders. I really want to use my experiences to help and encourage others, so I thought I would give it a go. It's quite difficult and it may not come to anything but I want to at least try! :)

Have been neglecting my GAMSAT study have to do some today. I may have stretched my time frame till next year but realistically it's still not that much time! I'm trying to educate myself on world news so I'm reading the paper and watching the news on TV.

I'm trying to keep moving onwards and upwards all the time, and trying to remain positive.

I'm not where I need to be but thank God I'm not where I used to be. I'm OK and I'm on my way! :D

:)

Over the hump!

Good evening!

It's been a silent blog for the past few days. I have been studying like crazy for my exams. Getting up at six o clock in the morning and going to bed at ten at night. If I'm not taking the test, I'm studying! Ouchies! Three exams over with now which means I am officially more than half way through! :D

Today was my worst exam. I really hope I scraped through, I'll be lucky if I did but I'm trying to be positive. I really am looking forward to Friday when everythings finished!

Then onto the GAMSAT! OH MAN!

Lol I feel like I am a permanent student. I never stop studying or learning something. Which is good I suppose, and part of the reason I am so attracted to medicine as a career. I like the idea of constantly being challenged and learning something new.

I am going to order the Gold Standard GAMSAT book of Friday. I have researched a good bit, and although it's not supposed to completely cover what you need to know, it's a definate start! It's not too unreasonably priced either.

Might look into the tutor situation next week. Am back to work for the summer! SOB! But my bank account will be happy once more!

Anyway I have got to sleep I am too tired to study tonight! Zzz...

:)

Exam period kicks off and Exam tips!

Afternoon!

I didn't get a chance to update as usual in the past day or so, as I was studying for an exam. The exam period is two weeks and I have 5 exams in total. One this week and four next week. Today's exam went surprisingly okay I think! It wasn't that I did any extra revision because I just crammed yesterday and this morning! But I remembered a surprising amount of very specific information such as authors and years.

Could my choline and inositol supplement be kicking in? I hope so! :D

After the exam I went shopping and I picked up some books for my GAMSAT revison, chemistry, maths and physics for Dummies! Exciting stuff! :)

Anyhoo seeing as it's exam period I got to thinking about the way different people approach exams.

I wanted to share some tips from my own experience on how to survive!

1) Give yourself time for revision.

This means try not to cram (ha I know how hard it is not to) but if you have time, plan out your revision time as best you can. Set realistic targets for revision, and when revising a lot of material switch topics after a while to keep your brain fresh.

2) Eat Well!

Maybe I'm always talking about nutrition but you know it's reallyyyy so important! Changing your diet can actually cure illnesses such as depression or fibromyalgia so try keep a balanced diet heading up to exams. Avoid junk foods that cause blood sugar spikes. Opt for good carbohydrates, lean proteins, good fats and fresh fruit and veg. On exam day itself, make sure to have breakfast! Make it a good one too! Scrambled egg with wholemeal toast and a piece of fruit will give you energy and fill you so your tummy doesn't start growling like a whale in the exam! :p

3) Get a Good Nights Sleep

Don't fall into the trap of cramming late the night before, drinking caffeine to stay awake. This puts stress on your body and your mind. You probably won't learn all that much anyway, and in the morning when the exam comes, you're probably not going to be able to remember all that much anyway! So get some sleep and let your body rest. If you find it hard to sleep with anxiety the night before exams try a chamomile tea. Chamomile is a herb which is known for its relaxing and soothing properties. Try avoid sleeping tablets, even herbal ones as they can make you feel groggy in the morning.

4) Take Some Deep Breaths

This is a good tip I picked up somewhere along the way. Taking a couple of deep breaths allows more oxygen to get to your brain, allowing you to think more clearly. It also calms you down. So wherever you are take some deep breaths and just quieten the mind for a second.

5) Avoid The Post-Mortem Overload

The first thing most people do after an exam is ask pretty much everyone they know, "Sooo how did you do?", while not so harmful in itself, make sure not to go overboard with the post exam analysis. What's done is done at that stage. You can't change anything and going over each section with your friends will probably only make you (and them) realise what you forgot to do, or didn't do, making you feel terrible. Best to just draw a line under it and hope for the best.

Overall keep a positive attitude. Exams will be over before you know it, and if worst comes to the worst and you fail, it's not the end of the world. You always have options. So don't stress, just do your best!

:)