Bon Giourno?

Well I am suffering from a serious case of procrastination and apathy. I just can't seem to get anything done at the moment. I think it's because I'm such a goal oriented person. I always like to plan what is going to happen and where I'm heading.

I've been slowly coming to terms with how unlikely it is of doing medicine over here. The fees are just so high. It puts so much pressure on you to do well in the course and even afterwards. I read about one woman who graduated and works as a doctor but feels suicidal because of the pressure of debt from her student loans. I don't want that kind of debt haning over my head.

Also another reason is I don't want to have to get my mother as a guarantor on the loan. It's too much to ask of her. Especially as she has helped so much in my education up to now.

Soooo Irelands out, UK would be great I know that there are more grants etc available for students, but the fees are still high. Around £9,000.

Now I'm thinking of trying Italy where fees range from around 650-6500. That's the scary option of moving completely abroad.

I'm a shy person and I struggle with depression and fibromyalgia so the prospect of moving away from all my support systems to a country I've never been to and don't speak the native language is a pretty intimidating one!

I also have to take an entrance exam which requires knowledge of science subjects. Not great for me.

This all probably means I'll need to take another year out after this degree I'm doing to get ready for it all. I know I can't be impatient about something so important but I feel like I've been waiting forever to do this. It's just horrible.

I probably need to stop worrying and planning so much for the future and just enjoy the present a bit more but I actually don't know how to do that. I am always thinking ahead. Always!

Well better head off and try get something done either work or meditation or something! :P

:)

Sun and Secrets

Morning!

Good lord it is hot here at the moment! 30 degrees. I'm definately not made for that kind of temperature. I was working in a hot kitchen for 5 days straight and now I've got a few days off I'm trying to recover from it! I do like the brightness of the sun though and I make sure to sit out and get my vitamin D for the day! :)

When I was working for those five days I actually got up early and studied chemistry before work. Now that I'm off I have to work extra hard not to be lazy. I need to study more.

I have been thinking about the year off after I finish my undergrad, and I reallyyy don't want to.

I am tempted to take my GAMSAT in March. I had previously discounted that as an option because it's in the middle of my final academic year. But I really want to just get started on my career.

So I'm considering that as an option at this stage.

I'm not going to tell anyone (except you) because I know no one will be supportive of the idea. I hate that I don't have that support in my life at the moment but well what can ya do?!

I'm off to make an iced americano before I melt!

:)

Lost Art of Blogging!

Afternoon!

I have been away from this blog for too long.

The reason being I have, and I suppose I still am, going through a massive period of doubt in my life. Not doubting wanting to pursue medicine. But doubting the timing of it all.

I have decided (somewhat resignedly) that I won't be able to take the GAMSAT in London this coming September. I just will not be ready.

I feel taking an extra year to prepare will not only help me achieve a better score, but it will also help me become a better person and ultimately a better doctor.

Apart from learning all of the scientific material etc required for the test, I feel I need to sort of "find myself".

My life is extrememly unbalanced and I am not really very physically or mentally healthy, and that definately needs to change if I want to become a doctor.

I don't really want to take a year off to be honest. I'm 24 this year and I feel like I have been waiting forever for my chance, but I guess I need to stop being so impatient and trust that when the time is right I will get my chance.

In the meantime I need to start living again. I need to shake off my depression and get back to reading books and newspapers, painting, going out with friends, taking walks and just generally BEING again. That's just as important as any hardcore study I think!

Anyhoo will update again soon! Results are out on Thursday! Eep!

:)

Sleepy Sunday zzz...

Evening!

Today I have been so exhausted! Got a fair bit done though so am happy that I had a productive day. I cleaned out my guinea pig cage, gave her a bath, sorted my phone billing out and then made food for my family and got in around 4 hours of study! :)

I had to push myself a bit. I didn't want to study. But I know that I will be studying for my GAMSAT (and then hopefully in med school) and I'm going to be tired and not in the humour of doing it, but I just have to do it. Keep my eyes on the prize and not slack off.

I guess what's been on my mind today is money.

Medicine is so expensive! I know that if I get into med school I will be applying for a loan, but I'm worried about everything that comes before that.

Everything related to the GAMSAT is so expensive! Books, materials, the test itself! Also if I am flying over to London in Sept, I'm going to need some money for that as well! Nightmare!

I also have to pay tuition for my final year in college which is ALOT!

I worked it out, and even if I work as much as possible, I can't afford to cover all the expenses I have this year, plus all that I had planned to do. I've abandoned the idea of a holiday. I guess I will have to abandon learning to drive as well, and that means I will have to reapply for my learners permit.

My minds just working on what to do to make and save money. I'm considering setting up an ebay account and trying to sell some of my stuff! Haha desperate times and all that.

I guess money is the first hurdle one must pass on the way to medschool. Sad that that is the first criteria for becoming a doctor, being able to shoulder the economic burden.

But it is what it is, and I won't give up. If I have to sell all I have, I will.

Except my bed...it's too comfy, and I'm off to dream now!

ZZZ

 

:)

Two tests or one?

I have read many Irish students travel to the UK to take their GAMSAT exam. I am wondering if I should try for the exam this coming Sept (scary!).

My fear would be that I will not be ready to take my exam that soon. But it would be good practice, and if I could do well in it, I would be able to relax and focus fully on my final year as an undergrad.

I found this very useful post about the lenght of time needed to prepare for the GAMSAT.

http://gamsatpreparation.blogspot.ca/2012/12/the-gold-standard-gamsat-study-schedule.html

Generally they say from 3-6 months.

I'm getting slightly nervous at the prospect of taking this so soon but it's something I need to consider.

I'm on the search for prep materials. I was looking into the Gold Standard but it costs a fortune and has not necessarily gotten great reviews.

Perhaps there is something better out there?

Off I go to do my research!:)

In the beginning...

Hi there!

Let me introduce myself. My name is Ali. I'm 23 years old and am a second year university student.

I decided to create this blog as I begin to prepare myself for applying to graduate medicine next year.

I have always wanted to be a doctor but I know that it is extremely difficult and gruelling. I don't have a lot of support at the moment. Most of the people around me doubt that I can or will succeed at following my dream. So I think a blog will be a good place to come and let out that frustration!

I'm also finding out how confusing the whole process is, not knowing how to prepare for the dreaded GAMSAT, or medschool itself.

I would like this blog to be a place I can share my experiences with others, as well as any information I find on graduate entry medicine that I think may be helpful to others.

I'm off to study for exams now so will post more later.

:)